On an unusually warm evening in late fall I sat on a folding chair on one of the brides’ side of the aisle. I had known Katie since before grade school. I went to school with her sister and our families were close. As I shifted in the white plastic lawn chair I had chosen to view the event from, I couldn’t recognize any faces. I scanned the rows hoping to see parts of her family that I could recognize, congratulate, and relate to. No one could be found. After some searching I resigned my search with the belief that they would walk out with her. So, I went back to counting blades of grass while waiting for Katie and her family to make their entrances.

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As music started and we all rose to stand to view the glowing bride. As she appeared in my line of sight I expected to see her grandpa walking her down the aisle, but what I saw was an older man I had never met before in my life. Her bright blue bowtie matched her future wife’s pants and the attire of the strange man I couldn’t place.

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As she passed, and I saw how happy she was, I remembered her first wedding. Her whole family was there, her dress was perfectly white, and the man that awaited her at the end of the aisle beamed. This time was different though. Not because of the missing dress or even the missing family. This time Katie actually beamed. She seemed more herself and happy now walking with a man that isn’t related to then she was when everything was considered picture perfect.

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Her missing family only shed more light on what Katie had been dealing with and how she was being treated for who she fell in love with. I knew her family lived a very religiously driven lifestyle and that the rift it caused when Katie came out.

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Since that time I have witnessed many things that her family said and did that made her doubt herself and this open life she was so happy to have now. I knew there would always be that rift, but I thought seeing your daughter, granddaughter, or sister on the day she is to marry the love of her life would be stronger than a religion that deems the partnership unnatural. I was wrong as they weren’t there. In the following months the unseen family was given news that, I can only assume, justified them not being there. A new policy was handed out by the church. It said that, “any member who supports same sex marriage, including the laws that make such marriages possible, are cross-wise with church teaching,” (Mayne, 2016). I know Katie was crushed that her family’s inability to see past her sexual preference was now being validated in a way that reassured her family that they were in the right.

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Some time has passed since that fall day and the two wanted to start having children. Katie knew her mom would be so happy for her to have a child but only if it was "her" child and not born from her spouse. They decided to have her spouse carry their first child and tell the family if they want to ever see any children she gives birth to that they will have to accept the couple's first child as part of the family.  Now at 3 months pregnant with their first child Katie's family has slowly started accepting them both. Her mother being the last hold out hesitantly working on it as she wants to see the future children of the couple. 

 

 

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Source:

Mayne, Mitch. “New Mormon LGBT Policy: Putting Already Vulnerable Youth at Even Greater Suicide Risk?”. Huff Post, 01/28/2017 (https://www.huffingtonpost.com/mitch-mayne/new-mormon-policy-on-lgbt_1_b_9083714.html)